14. Finding time
Time for myself and time for what's most important
I remember when I was younger and childfree, an older parent told me that I would magically find that I have more time. I didn’t understand because I thought it would be the opposite.
In my 20s, I often thought I didn’t have enough time for my work, for my family or my friends. I was distracted easily and didn’t know how to use my time wisely. Yet, here I am, in my mid-30s, with another human to take care of and somehow I’ve found time to do extra things for my baby while still working, traveling, seeing family and friends.
It wasn’t that I didn’t have time before, I just didn’t know how to spend it. Now, I’ve become more selfish and picky with my time. When I think about making the most of my time, I used think it meant seeing and doing everything I can possibly squeeze into the limited time I have in my life. I had long bucket lists or big goals, but these days I find the boring and ordinary more appealing. Some days, I use my time to sleep, read, sit and play with baby A, watch a show with my husband and text a few friends. I would consider that a good use of my time because it was with things I care for most.
Who deserves my time? What kind of assignments and work will get my time? Which friends will I travel to see?
Last week, my family and I travelled to Maui for a dear childhood friend’s wedding. It took a lot of time - flying there, spending days away from potential assignments, having flights cancelled, adjusting to changing time zones, but none of it felt like a loss. One of my favorite nights was when we ate a frozen pizza at our airbnb, sat outside and watched the sun set.
In my early days as a photographer, I rarely took time off for myself. I didn’t know how to. I gave most of my time away to clients and assignments. Some of it would be considered an investment into my career, but I wonder if I really needed to sacrifice all that time with family and friends for $150 assignments.
Having a child as a freelancer has made it clear to me how precious my time is. I don’t think I have more time now, but instead I’m hyper aware of how little time I have and to make better use of it. This means saying no to some assignments, saying no to some hang outs, saying yes to family and friends even if it means a loss with a gig.
Making the most of my time looks different now, but I think it means my life is more of my own rather than someone else’s.
Recent Work…
I took portraits of author David Waldstreicher for his new book “The Odyssey of Phillis Wheatley” and some of the items he used for his research.
Photo editor: Amanda Boe
For the Wall Street Journal, I spent two days at Cooper University Hospital in Camden, New Jersey to observe how the military trains their members in the trauma department at the hospital.
Photo editor: Ariel Zambelich
For The Washington Post, I met Ted and his wife Ann, for story the hassle on dealing with health insurance in the US. Post readers sent in their personal stories of navigating health insurance.
Photo editor: Maya Valentine
For the New York Times, I travelled to Nesquehoning, Pennsylvania and spent some time at Panther Valley Elementary school to see how they teach phonics to their students. This story is about parents and educators advocation for the science of reading in order to improve reading ability for students across the country.
Photo editor: Heather Casey
Other things…
The New York Times - UPenn Accuses a Law Professor of Racist Statements. Should She Be Fired?
The Wall Street Journal - How Sexual Assault Allegations Against a U.S. Chess Grandmaster Went Unaddressed for Years
Christianity Today - Bhutanese Nepali Refugees Turn Their Trials into Zeal for Evangelism
I am in Seoul, South Korea from May 1 - June 14. I will be working but also spending time with family and friends. Feel free to reach out for any potential assignments in South Korea!
In December, I was awarded the IWMF Fund for Women Journalist grant and will work with the Washington Post to work on a project in South Korea.
In March, I was awarded a National Geographic Society Explorer grant. I will return to South Korea in September to work on this grant.
I’ve been experimenting with film (ugh, but why is it is so expensive). here are a few frames from my Hasselblad and old Fuji film I found.
I’ve been slowly catching up on reading. I highly recommend Nicole Chung’s memoir A Living Remedy. I’ve also been listening to these quick episodes from Make Your Damn Bed - 8 minute episodes on advice/tips/thoughts on mental, emotional and physical health. What are some books you recommend? Any new releases I should check out?
Thanks for reading through ✨
Book Rec: “The Bear” by Andrew Krivak.
Safe travels to South Korea!!